I can't write about what nursing my baby has meant to me without getting tears in my eyes and a lump in my throat. Even after 16 months I still can't believe it works, that his thighs are chunky because my body made them that way. That I could produce this substance that sustains my baby and gives him comfort. I can't describe the waves of love that overtake me when he latches, the sweet way he looks at me, that little humming noises that he makes. His eyes meet mine, then go half-lidded, then open again in pleasure, I can't take my eyes off him. His belly is against mine, his legs curl around my waist, he fits perfectly. His hands stroke my face, rub my arms, and find their way into my hands. His head smells so unbelievably sweet. I love when he falls asleep while nursing and touch his face, this baby is mine!!! How did I get so lucky? While he's playing he comes over for a pit stop and will nurse energetically for just a few moments and then rush back to the game. Sometimes he can't decide which one he wants and will sample both several times before settling. He definitely has a favorite, my right and choose that one more often. He hasn't made a name for them yet and I'm curious about what he will come up with, he is funny little guy so I imagine it will be clever and unique. He still likes to nurse at night and will do so without waking up. Thank goodness for this, I have not experienced sleep deprivation with him. He is possessive of them and will fight his older brother for dominion of my lap and will yet at his father when he gets to close. He likes to talk and smile at them. I would gladly nurse him for years and years and dread the day when he decides he has had enough of him. I have loved every moment spent cradling my little love and heart grows even more with every day of his life. I think it goes without saying that I have tears running down my face. Thank you God for this precious gift.
